AT HOME NOW: Feeling Inside Out

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I started writing these articles right when COVID-19 first hit, and I was all freaked out because I thought my kids might miss a week of school and my yoga studio might let fewer people into class. Turns out those may have been the good old days.  I mean, right when the COVID numbers are trending down and the temperature is trending up and the restaurants are hosing off their outdoor furniture…. Wham!  Our country suffers a collective loss so huge that I literally had trouble catching my breath after learning the circumstances of George Floyd’s death.  It was staggering news -- and here I am -- just a white woman living in an affluent hamlet with a business that makes fine homes look even finer.  I think I can fathom the fury and despair of these protests, but I’m not sure I really can.  I’ve reflected lately: does change have to be this hard?  And, for this I think, yes -- it might have to be just this hard.  I can only hope we are on the right path.

What do I do to clear my head, feel my sorrow, and gain my strength?  I gather with friends… outside… six feet apart… in small groups only… but still.  So, let’s talk about some good ways to set up the outside of your home so it feels just as warm and welcoming as the inside.  And to that end, I have found myself doing that quite literally - I steal the indoor couch pillows and use an indoor tablecloth and put out some cozy blankets and even haul out a couple of living room chairs. After all, no one is going into my living room anyway.

In these somber times, if friends are coming over, it almost feels like a forbidden Christmas morning, doesn’t it?  I get a little adrenalin surge that I’m actually going to see other people in the flesh! Friends that I could reach out and touch!(I promise I would never… but that feeling of knowing that I could…)  And me? I want these unicorn guests to be comfortable and not thirsty (wink wink) and appreciating their no-share snacks (I made individual spring rolls!) so that they ignore that tricky, buggy time of night and stay even a little bit later.  For some reason I consider that a personal win.  And then yes, I hear you -- at the end of the night I’m up hauling it all back in.  But honestly, who cares?

And so, as with most of my advice, it starts with comfort. You need comfortable seating for your small group, and that seating needs to allow for the dreaded six feet (unless they are from the same household).  This is really what drives me to bring out my indoor furniture.  Because your outdoor couch, which is usually seating for three, may just hold one guest with the proper social distancing.  (Which can set me to wailing like a two-year-old, "WHEN WILL IT END?"  But that's between me and my therapist.)

Think about your furniture layout the same way you would any other room in your house.  Your guests need some place to put down their drink, and they don't want to yell to make good conversation.  Arranging the seating in a circle is a strong instinct -- but be careful because it can suddenly look like a summit meeting.  (And also, doesn't it crave some central focal point? Maybe a fire pit… or a sushi chef… or a juggler?  I don’t know -- you’ll figure it out.)  So also try thinking about your outdoor floor plan like it’s a square-ish "room."  Put a few of those six-feet-apart chairs along one side of the square, and your couch on another.  Mix in your living room side tables, couch pillows, and blankets -- and, there.  You've done it.

And, gosh, I could go on.  But the rest of it you know, right?  Potted plants or flowers… music… good drinks… a few not-shared snacks… some discreet bug spray off to the side.  You’ve done it before, I know you have.  But for me, after last week, it’s just really about setting the stage for your fabulous friends to be fabulous.  Comfort them, feed them, keep them warm.  What they give back -- what you give to each other -- that’s what's really important.

decorating, comfort, friendship, home design, interior design